Advice to Indian men who desire attractive women: invest in personality than community
The Indian male's reputation took a serious hit in 2012 with the tragic Nirbhaya rape/murder in Delhi which captured worldwide attention. Just as that was dying down you had the "hey beby send bobs and vagene" ,"milk truk arrive" crowd. Lets leave aside the possibility that much of this was concerted strike against India by some bad players.They probably gave themselves away with "bob" . Indians have difficult pronouncing the o in bob. They would type it as bub or boub if they would indeed misspell it. Also its quite unlikely they would write vagina as vagene but rather as vajina. This is Borat redux. But even so, Indian men dont themselves any favors. One of the terrible fears I had since around 2005 was the world would find out soon that Indian men were not Bollywood charmers but super dorks and dweebs. It first started when I saw fairness cream ads for men promoted by no other than the incredibly shameless and immoral Shah Rukh Khan. SRK is one of the most richest celebrities in the world. He didnt get that way by having integrity and maintaining his self respect. He would literally dance at weddings of rich people. Apparently thats whats respectable these days. Earlier it was associated with eunuchs.
Anyhow the point is that even Bollywood men or even Hollywood celebrities for that matter arent very charismatic. Take a look as to how Ben Affleck or Robert De Niro behave with women , they are completely lacking in charisma. Hollywood and Bollywood swallows the charisma and spits out hollow shells
This is analogous to how Indian men are raised. Each and every aspect of masculinity, charisma, risk taking , sense of adventure, romance,sensuality is actively drained out by Indian culture ,education and society. What is resulting is an automaton who of course will veer towards careers which can easily be replaced by machine in the incoming transhumanist agenda- engineering, accounting, medicine.
Couple this with crippling inferiority complexes vis a vis fair skin and aquiline features and the pitiful state is there for all to see. So what is to be done.
Well the good news for men is that while looks are a big deal, women have a more holistic approach in attraction compared to men. Women can overlook lack of physical appeal if men's personality shines through. Problem is due aforementioned reasons Indian men dont have much of personality.
For the record I will state that good looks are not based on fair skin or acquiline features but even and symetrical features and smooth ,radiant and even skin. I have Tamil and Telugu dudes who are considered unattractive back in the motherland quite successful with women of various races abroad as they have symettrical features and healthy looking skin and hair. It also doesnt hurt that they are in shape, well dressed and were interesting people.
I realize being Indian is a negative for men in the dating market. Here is how you overcome that- become an individual and not member of xyz group /caste or nation. Stop tying your identity (solely) with your citizenship or allegiance to a country and develop an identity and personality of your own. What is ironic about European and Americans is that though these men are consdered attractive by virtue of having those genes and nationality, it is not so much their background as their personality and individuality that shines through. In other words individuality provides a sort of psychic charge to your charisma and over generations can actually create better looking children.
Now with regard to looks or height you play the cards you are dealt with. But clothing, fitness and hygiene is very much in your control. Fitness and bodybuilding is more mainstream compared to before and thats a good thing. But I see still too many young people flabby and pot bellied , slovenly dressed with body odor trying to hit on Western women. Of course they fail and make the rest of us look bad. Fix your hair, posture, physique, shower regimen and diet . And buy some clothes which fit and dont hang off you. Look at this weirdo Hari Kandabolu, notorious for cancelling Apu from the Simpsons, born and brought up in U.S but dresses terribly, bad hair cut, not overweight but looks out shape and looks sweaty and smelly. And no wonder he is angry and frustrated and externalizes on a Indian stereotype Apu, who annoying but harmless as he was created from affection not malice.
The odd part is that he is not such a bad looking guy as he has symmetrical features but he let his looks go to shit. Even the handsome YouTuber Indian American Captain Sindbad aka Nikhil Pandey was looking rather like a dork at an earlier stage. Even then you could see his features and jawline which indicated a handsome man was there in there somewhere. A lot of Indian men actually are good looking but they just wreck their looks due to poor physique, low charisma and bad diet and dress sense.
A man who smells good, dresses well, (shoes included, shoes are a big fucking deal), has good hair and skin is already above 95th percentile. When you approach a women in this state , she wont flinch and walk away , she will actually give you a chance. Though keep in mind some communities are by default very well groomed. Arab bakers and butchers in general are better dressed and groomed than Indian businessmen. This is a sad and painful truth but its there. The "good news" is that American and British men generally are getting sloppier by the year but still as of now they are at an advantage.
Now regarding the accent. There is no way around it , Indian accent is not sexy. Actually I should qualify that. There are different Indian accents for English. Some are better than others. I had women tell me my accent is appealing. But I am not typical as it is a hybrid of "convent school" Indian accent(though i never attended convent school) , American(I lived there during formative years) and a generic cosmoplitan English accent(Dubai).
Rather than focus on changing accents or imitating accents which just makes people cringe, focus of pronouncing words in a way that can be understood . Also do mouth exercises that one is less likely to mumble. This is what I did. I noticed that while people in U.S understood me they didnt get when I spoke a few words such as naivete and the like. So I pronounced it as to their comprehension and this spread to many other words. And this led to cadences and rhythm which in turn became an accent or rather a hybrid accent. Which makes Indians and Americans both look at me with curiosity haha.
Also the voice. Many Indian men have reedy, nasal voices which is far from appealing. While a bass voice is not possible to create as its formed in puberty. There are ways to have a rich and resonant voice which you can find on YouTube. Kevin Spacey and Paul Giamatti took voice modulation training for their roles in House of Cards and Billions. And no it is not expensive. This can be done with some courses in Youtube.
Finally just as you consider yourself an individual consider the lady's individuality in question. If you pursue a woman just because she is white, you are doing her a disservice as well as yourself. She can see you coming a mile away anyway and avoids you accordingly. Now the issue even considering looks, charisma, dress etc, there is still the cultural commonality. If you are only familar with SRK, Modi and samosa there is not much to discuss with women of other cultures. However part of developing a personality and individuality is to be curious and have varied interests such as Renaissance architecture, art, classical music, wine and coffee tasting,popular and serious literature, contemporary society and politcs , mountain climbing, travel, photography. You see my point. If you are not interesting then expect people to have any interest in you. The more curiosity you have, the more like people can a have a rapport with you.
Finally dont think of terms of making a girlfriend. Make a social network and let this occur organically.
A warning: You will find many Indians with crab mentality who will try to drag you down and ridicule your self improvement efforts and even call you a wannabe ,gora, coconut or traitor. Those guys are best avoided. Time to make new friends
Best of luck.
Sir, thank you very much for these tips.
ReplyDeleteMy advantage: I do not identify with my nationality, ethnicity, caste or religion but only with myself.
Let me be honest here, yes, I am still a dork and a dweeb (for now, nothing is forever). I have not come out of that state of mind for the most part.
I have multiple talents (though nascent): I can fix lights, fans and other electrics in my house/room. I can cook to some extent. I know and can do a lot of things like control and automation, hacking (to some extent), work well with Linux (Ubuntu, CentOS and Kali), do machine and deep learning and of course work with boards like Arduino and Raspberry Pi. By the end of this year, I hope to fly drones too.
But yes, I flounder in everything else but I am willing to change whatever I fail at and more.
All that aside, what must I do if I want to attract a Turkish girl? I still have 5+ years before I think about all that so I consider it ample time to change. I am not at all interested in White girls (I am too small for them) or East Asian girls (they are eccentric, I heard). If not an Indian girl, I prefer a Turkish/Iranian girl (I lean more towards Turks).
I have multiple talents (though nascent): I can fix lights, fans and other electrics in my house/room. I can cook to some extent. I know and can do a lot of things like control and automation, hacking (to some extent), work well with Linux (Ubuntu, CentOS and Kali), do machine and deep learning and of course work with boards like Arduino and Raspberry Pi. By the end of this year, I hope to fly drones too."
DeleteThose are useful skills. Sadly not skills that women find attractive. I certainly dont recommend structuring your life around attracting women. But artistic pursuits are more likely to attract them.
All that aside, what must I do if I want to attract a Turkish girl? I still have 5+ years before I think about all that so I consider it ample time to change. I am not at all interested in White girls (I am too small for them) or East Asian girls (they are eccentric, I heard). If not an Indian girl, I prefer a Turkish/Iranian girl (I lean more towards Turks)"
What did I just say about selecting women as per nationality? Why do you even want Turkiish or Iranian? Think about that. Tons of Iranians in Europe and Los Angeles and Toronto for instance. Turkish outside Turkey you will find in Italy, UAE, U.K and Germany/Austria. Turkish and Iranians can be pretty tall. So if you think your height is a disadvantage you have your work cut out for you.
Also Indiachan readers and other young men- I am not interested in mocking you as incels or whatever but if you are an "incel" you will remain so if you subscribe to bluepill/redpill nonsense. Most of you bashing me havent left your hometown and are barely adults. Take it from this "boomer"- The real world is far more complex and messy. This red pill is a phase you go through. I did too and went beyond it. If you remain stuck in the mindset of that you have some secret gyaan regarding women which older men dont, I can only laugh at this. Yes women like men are amoral at their core as they are often subject to their biology. Whoa mind blown! Never heard that before.
And also I mentioned Tamil and Telugu men precisely BECAUSE they their market value is generally lower than says Punjabi. And hence mentioned stuff that helped them come out on top. Amitabh Bachchan (young version) is universally popular with women as is SRK ( I dont get his appeal but whatever). WHat was interesting that women I know Kamalahassan , Nagarjuna and Surya far more sensual and appealing than Hrithik Roshan who more than one women described as charming but horse faced. North Americans in general dont really care for oblong faces . This look doomed John Kerrys 2004 campaign against the more compact Bush. The point is what passes for conventional good looks in India is based on very narrow metrics determined by dominant Bollywood ethnic groups. It is ironic that people who dont resemble those ethnic groups have internalized this self hatred and mock others for not resembling Kapoors or Khans. I can only laugh at these people.
I was not going to structure my life around attracting women. Since you addressed Indian men on this issue, I decided to let you know. My well-being comes first for me.
DeleteSorry for mentioning that I wanted Turkish/Iranian girls. I mean, I am attracted to women who have very large noses (one of the strangest things to get attracted by but then that is me).
Are you really a boomer? Are you not Generation X (born between 1964 and 1979)?
Bollywood is a disease that needs to be eradicated asap.
What did I just say about selecting women as per nationality? Why do you even want Turkiish or Iranian? Think about that. Tons of Iranians in Europe and Los Angeles and Toronto for instance. Turkish outside Turkey you will find in Italy, UAE, U.K and Germany/Austria. Turkish and Iranians can be pretty tall. So if you think your height is a disadvantage you have your work cut out for you.
ReplyDeleteTo elaborate, dont think in terms of attracting x or y nationality. Attractiveness is generally universal. You probably have better chance with Iranians than Turks. Turkish women particularly from Istanbul tend to be prima donnas abroad. Though in Turkey they are personable. NOt all speak English though. In Istanbul I had to get by with broken French and Arabic. I visited 10 years ago , I am told the situation is better now. But my sources are other Turks and Arabs so take that with a grain of salt
Thank you for telling me all this.
DeleteBut yes, I should not be looking for anyone of any particular ethnicity or nationality. I need to be accommodating to all. That way, I will stand a better chance than when I look for any particular race. I will keep this in mind.
Re: Istanbul, speaking Arabic, I can understand because Turkey is an Islamic country, but where did French come into the picture? I am curious.
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ReplyDeleteI should that women who most forgiving of the flaws of Indian men (to a degree, they still have ovaries) are these- Russian, Polish , Romanian, Irish, Latin American (mestizo ,not so much Euro).
DeleteFor those who say Russian and other Slavic women are all hookers- thank you good bye, you lost the battle before firing the first shot. There is no hope for you.
Re American women, Christopher Hitchens said that two great secrets of America are Class and Empire. Despite their egalitarian claims, Americans are not so much race but class conscious. If you are pursuing a middle class American girl from say the great plains states such as Iowa, Nebraska or Wisconsin it is either 100 or 0. As these are mostly Germanic and Scots rural areas where a non white is a still a curiosity. But if you wish to betray Shiva, and convert to Mormonism there is a pretty girl of Scandinavian descent will be assigned to you by the elders of Utah. Middle class girls in the coasts tend to be pickier as they are more cosmopolitan. Funny thing about upper class girls whose dads are either in Defense, tech titans, Wall Street, D.C or Hollywood and go to Ivy League schools is that they wouldnt be caught dead with a middle or lower class white. Lower class white women go for black men often and vice versa. Indian men are to their liking as they prefer hyper masculine types who are quite familiar with guns .
Upper class white and Asian American would prefer to copulate with or marry a similarly placed Indian or Indian American. However Indian and Indian American women with Ivy degrees have a terrible attitude. Ive dated nice white women from Princeton and UPenn and wouldnt have guessed they had such pedigree but Indian women from those schools wouldnt give me the time of day as I went to a state college. Well fuck you too bitch.
Even Indian middle class men have what some Americans consider upper class taste such as squash, tennis and fondness of P.G Wodehouse and British literature of a bygone era. Those are not your usual Bharatmata ki Jai types of course.
Those are the Jats born there usually in big cities who often go out with white women but generally prefer to stick to Punjabi types and marry early. Often good looking they tend to lose their looks early on due to bad diet and excessive bulking. Their facial features disappear and cant often tell if they are Samoans or even light skinned blacks. SL Tamils in Toronto I have seen with mostly Hispanic and Chinese but not white. But they do shack up with whites usually lower middle class in London. The rougher sorts of Tamils tend to be London.
Any way , for what its worth.
Of all the ethnic groups you listed:
Delete1. Russian women - Russians make lifelong friends and are committed partners, both men and women, I think? At least that is what I heard.
But they expect their husbands to accompany them and settle in Russia, no? I heard a few cases where their husbands (Indian and others) settled with them in Russia. That is obviously a big no for me who cannot withstand even Bengaluru's pleasant weather, now forget Russia's unforgiving cold weather. I am the kind of person who did not turn on the AC in Chennai when it was peak summer in May. I prefer weather where the temperature is at least 40C and at an average 45C. I drink 1-2 liters of water maximum even during summer. In that sense, countries like Saudi Arabia, the UAE and Australia are ideal destinations for a desert dweller like me. Russian women are therefore out of question.
2. Polish women - I am aware that a lot of them married Indian men. But I do not know too much about them. Is it the same now? Poland is under a far right govt.
3. Romanian women - No comments. I do not know anything about them. But wait, are you mentioning ethnic Romanians alone or also the Roma Gypsies who happen to live in the region?
4. Irish women - Yes.
5. Latin American women - I do not know the first thing about them so I cannot comment on them. Except:
a. Mexican food is spicy.
b. Brazil and Argentina are mad about football.
c. Venezuela is a socialist nightmare.
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
6. Your take on Americans is interesting. I am out of shape now but I was getting into shape last year before things got too pressing. I will get back into shape in good time. I am naturally strong, not boasting here.
Re: Upper class Americans, come to think of it, you are right. There is a DMK MLA by the name Palanivel Thiaga Rajan aka PTR whose wife is an American. He is the MLA of central Madurai and a highly educated man.
But are not Samoans attractive? Dwayne Johnson aka The Rock is Samoan, if I recall correctly. There are many Samoans in the rugby teams of Australia and New Zealand.
So the only deciding factor is time. Now it is time to put all of this in the back-burner and get back to work.
Once again, thank you very much for telling me.
You told us about Indian men. Is this the same story for Indian women dating foreign men, or do they face a different set of challenges?
ReplyDeleteMen of what nationalities fit in well with Indian women? After all, Indian women are cut out from the same cloth as men.
Thanks.
Women by default have it easier in the dating market. A dark skinned but attractive Indian women may find fewer suitors back home but will quickly find out she is desirable abroad and proceed accordingly.
DeleteGenerally they date and marry whites though not so much Slavic types. The intermarriage rate between Indian Americans and whites is rather high. It is skewed towards Indian women marrying white men than vice versa.
These marriages are usually stable. The children are generally made aware of their Indian heritage and even the husband is sometimes Indianized to a degree. But they drift to the mainstream and just becomes whites with some flavor haha.
In other words, men usually find it harder than women irrespective of nationality. So this is more of a default setting than something that varies with ethnicity.
DeleteI have a query: Have you ever dated a Latina? If so, what are they like? What kind of people are Latinos? Like, do they approach life in a free-spirited, laid-back or serious manner?
ReplyDeleteI ask because I was reading through a Tamil forum wherein a Latina said she wanted to marry a Tamil man. Now that made me curious because Tamils are a tiny community who make up just 5% of India's population and much lesser of the world population. I had no idea Tamils would become famous all the way up to Latin America.
Delete"I have a query: Have you ever dated a Latina? If so, what are they like? What kind of people are Latinos? Like, do they approach life in a free-spirited, laid-back or serious manner?"
Rather than live vicariously through my experiences hahahaaha, it is best if you travel and put yourself out there and find out for yourself.
"I ask because I was reading through a Tamil forum wherein a Latina said she wanted to marry a Tamil man. Now that made me curious because Tamils are a tiny community who make up just 5% of India's population and much lesser of the world population. I had no idea Tamils would become famous all the way up to Latin America."
Looks like this Latin chick is just another thot with specific target demographics. Chances are she has little interest in any specific type of men except those who can provide her with a vast array of gucci handbags, versace dresses ,lancome cosmetics amongst other luxuries through her instagram,onlyfans,patreon, youtube and other portals.